Archive for December, 2010

This summarises most of what I’ve been feeling these past weeks.

Anyway,truth to be told,I can’t really believe that it’s year end already.We’re fast approaching Christmas and 2011 is in less than 10 days’ time.I know right.All I wish is that 2011 would be a reasonable year.Not a good year,for I know that things don’t always go as planned,but I wish it would be a year where I would be stronger than before,braver than before and possibly,happier and more myself than before.2010 was a heck of a struggle especially due to the impending national exams,but one thing I’ve often realized is that no matter how painful,how daunting,how arduous 2010 was,how tiring and exhausting the JC route was,I have and will never.REGRET.A.SINGLE.THING.For they all play an important role in crafting the person I am today.No matter how dark life is,I guess we can console ourselves by the sheer fact that nothing’s permanent.Joy is temporary,so is pain and suffering.We wish that happiness at its peak must remain at its peak, but we forget that all things on earth are submitted to the whims of gravity and what goes up must come down.Prom has came and gone and all I’m left with are pictures of those who I hold dear to me and now,it’s time to put everything down to rest.Honestly,2010 was a blur of events and I find myself crying over every single failed test,every single downturn in my academic life which was seriously the most trying event I had to go through.I remembered all the sweat and tears in 2010 and I remember how sick I was going through the same old dull stuff over and over and over again.Consistency was my companion in the A levels prep process and now,the A levels are over and I’ve officially graduated from Meridian.

Speaking of Meridian, despite the muggeridian culture,I can safely say that I love the school,the people,the teachers with all my heart.I’ve never loved a school so badly before.Maybe it’s due to the fact that I’ve grown alot during these 2 years.In secondary school,it was a flurry of stuff,and I was trying to understand myself and what I want,but in Meridian,I was mature enough to try things out for myself instead of merely watching and hoping.I guess this is the difference.The fact that JC was really a major case of ups and downs and rollercoaster rides,it left a huge impression in my memory-from orientation to soccer games to school events to MUGGING,it never fails to resound in my head and I’m typing this down now so that I will not forget.I know as I grow older and enter the adult world,I might be bombarded with the problems of reality and of growing up and other nonsensical stuff,so I might forget-and I don’t want to.Of course,there are a few things worth forgetting,but that’s not the point.The point is these past 2 years have been the happiest years of my academic life for I do feel truly alive despite the drudgery of things and it’s been an amazing journey.Really.So amazing that I wanted to stay on in Meridian.However that’s hapless thinking because thinking back,as much as I want to remain in the school,I don’t want to repeat anything over again.That’s when the truth hurts.alot.As much as I love my life for the past 2 years,I know that time has pressed me to move on.We all have to.We all will eventually.I hope I’ll still be in contact with the amazing people I’ve known in the school.I don’t know how Life would be without them being by my side,especially in J2.Right now we’re all at the  crossroads of our  lives,choosing the differing paths that we will take.We all have choices that may lead us onto separate paths and life will get in the way,but I know that wherever these friends are,wherever they will be,whenever I will chance to think of them,I will surely pray for them to be alright and happy in whatever they do.That’s how I feel,for I’ve never been good at goodbyes.I’m a sop when goodbye comes.

Whatever the case is,we’re creatures of the here and now and will remain to be until the end of days.This instinct in us will ease the pain of looking back and allow us to move on stronger into the future,into the green light.The fact that I’m able to put all these into writing now is the first step towards letting go.All I wanna say is,to my friends and all those who had entered my life,thank you for the memories.As much as I hate to acknowledge,Meridian is now-part of the past-and I have to move on from it,in order for my own Life to begin.We all have our own growing up to do and someday,who knows if Life reckons,we’ll cross paths again.For now,take care friends;I’ll meet you guys someday.

P.S:Goodbye my RedDevil. This Christmas with all the other Christmases that has yet to go by.



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