Archive for December, 2011

1998 – Infinity.

I think I haven’t really told anyone how much I love Westlife.

As much as my memory allows, it dates me back to the time when I was 8 and I heard Westlife’s My Love for the first time in 2000 through the casette player(YES I KNOW I’M VERY OLD). It would be quite apt to say that I grew up listening to Westlife’s music and it would be even cliche to say that without Westlife I wouldn’t be who I am today-but you know what? The things that are cliche, are more often than not true.They burst with so much truth that sometimes,it’s really hard to admit but at the end of the day,in the deep silence of the night where all mankind is drugged with sleep and you seem to be the only person wide awake under the covers albeit bleary eyed,a familiar melody from the distant past comes to mind “an empty street,an empty house,a hole inside my heart…”

Westlife was the first boyband-band that I learnt all the songs by heart.I remember spending countless hours listening to their songs on repeat and I’m sure I had worn out that cassette (I’m still keeping it even though I no longer have a cassette player-for old time’s sake, as a memorandum of the good halcyon days) I remember screeching at the top of my lungs in the middle of the night and I remember listening to their songs the days leading to final year exams and etc. I remember telling myself that they were the only band that I would ever love even though there are other bands that I really love now,but the love for Westlife remains in a separate entity of it’s own and that fervent passion is Unbreakable. I can’t really use words adequately to express the surge of energy and irreversible impact that the band has in my life because that means fleshing out the nitty bitty of my childhood and you can’t really examine the pieces separately,but rather they’re good as a whole. Westlife to me is like a fish in the water-sorry for the seemingly crude analogy-it’s like a fish would never notice that it needs water to survive,like how my parts of my life had been so stemmed in the existence of Westlife and their songs I think it’s an understatement to say that I was mildly bothered by the news of their disbandment in October this year. In fact,I was tearing up ,devastated and was an emotional wreck. Yes I had deviated from Westlife in the recent years;but isn’t this about growing up? We are constantly fickle and changing everyday-yet deep down I can never abandon the band.I cannot denounce who I had been at that point in time.Humans are such obnoxious creatures honestly. It’s like the world flits from one frenzy to another faster than you can say “alohomora” and then when something is sent to it’s demise or whatever,the whole world flits back and starts mourning for the loss. I don’t know how to get about this but the wackiest thing about mankind has got to be the absence of the awareness of “living” and “leaving”. It’s a pun on the word-to think that life and death are entwined by the pronounciation of words and this goes for the life and death of bands. The world doesn’t value Westlife enough until October 2011 and the music industry is thrown into a whirlpool of lamentation for such an influential band and the world will never make such goodmusic again-I think I’m berating myself instead of the world.

I wish I had made a conscious effort to make Westlife an indisputable part of my life.There was a time when they graced the walls of my bedroom and now,they’ve made their return.I need to make a conscientious effort to keep them in my life.1998-2012? This timeline does not exist in my own calendar. I refuse to admit that they’ve ceased to exist,but rather I’ll like to read it this way-the boys have now graduated and they should experiment with different things in life.That’s what they said and I will always remember that. Moving on does not mean forgetting-it just means milking the best out of all that Life had given you before and chalking new routes and getting your footsteps padded across all the other endeavors.

After all, life is coined by the three “mores”-SEE MORE,LEARN MORE,FEEL MORE-by MY 2011.

I’ll like to remember the innocent me that had loved Westlife 11 years ago. The music industry is overtly saturated with wannabes plastered with way too much makeup and packaged with sex appeal and so on to retain the love of the everchanging audience. Fans seem to swarm towards idols with handsome looks and polished stances and it’s the exterior that really counts.I admit that I’m part of that crowd too sometimes, but the point I’m trying to get across right now is the fact that I was “chaste” in the past. Honestly when I learned to love Westlife I DID NOT EVEN KNOW HOW THEY LOOKED LIKE,and I never bothered to find out.I didn’t bother to find out their characters, their birthdays,their schools, their history etc.Basically all I had loved of them was purely along musical lines. I love the fact that I could feel their songs and how they seemed to touch me so much with every enunciation of the lyrics. The Me today would have never condone this kind of behaviour-I staunchly believe in knowing the 101 of your idols before giving your whole heart to them. Westlife was the exception and they still are today. I don’t even flinch at the idea that 4/5 of them are fathers now etc -I LOVE THEM SO MUCH I JUST WANT THEM TO BE HAPPY. Them being happy and doing what they want is more than enough for me honestly. Westlife was and will always be THE Exception.

Shane Filan. Nicky Byrne. Kian Egan. Mark Feehily. Brian McFadden.

They might be known as members of a former band,Westlife in future and new bands will seek to render them to the sketches of  memory, but their legacy will never be dethroned in my heart.How am I supposed to leave you boys now when you all had left such a prominent impact on my 8 year old self? I will always hold them dear to my heart and never let go.

it’s time to move on now

so don’t be afraid

we should remember the roles that we played

whether the future has dark or bright days

I will still love you yeah… to the last mile of the way.

To Westlife, I will always be with all of you to the very last mile of the way.

Until the world stops turning and the sun stops burning.


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We arrived at the stadium quite early~

The pretty pearl ruby red ocean that I was a part of~

The wristbands we wore~




Boys with the host and translator~


Dynn and I~

View from our seats~

The pearl red balloon =D

I really love the lightstick <3333

Okay,so I’m just gonna type this fanaccount first~ Waiting for my friend’s pictures before I post the others alongside those professional pictures from last night. 4 DEC 2011-HONESTLY ONE OF THE BEST NIGHTS I EVER HAD.IT WAS EQUIVALENT TO 29 JAN 2011.

I finally fulfilled my dream of seeing DBSK,even though it’s currently Homin now,but like all Cassies,I’ll always keep the faith.Somehow,things always fall apart so that better things can come together.Okay So.Where should I start.Let me start off in the noon where Dynn and I went to get the merchandise first.

So I met Dynn at the stadium MRT and we went to get the merchandise.We were told that the merchandise would only be sold at 4pm,but we arrived at 3pm and woah,there were already people buying!!! I intended to only buy the posters but the LIGHTSTICKS WERE SO DAMN PRETTY I JUST COULDN’T RESIST.It had the words “TVXQ FANPARTY SINGAPORE 2011” imprinted on it and for memory’s sake I just had to buy it.Both of us were so happy when we could finally get our hands on the merch and Dynn bought this towel which was beautiful,but I had money constraints(for FEB 2012 of course) haha and she said she’ll tag me in that pic so yipee.We left the Stadium for dinner-> FAST FORWARD TO 6PM

There was a long queue to go into the stadium and my,the weather was so humid and yet it was raining.Honestly the Singaporean weather is totally berserk. Anyway,the thing is as we were queuing to get in,we were standing outside the stadium level 2 itself and OMG WE COULD HEAR HOMIN PRACTICING FOR THE FANPARTY.THE FIRST SONG WAS HOW CAN I and I was squealing inside,like OMG HOMIN AND I ARE JUST SEPARATED BY A WALL. and there was this blind covering the walls and Dynn noticed that the lightings could be seen from the peekaboo space and OMG FLASHES OF LIGHT I WAS THRILLED. It was hilarious when they started rehearsing for WHY because the moment we heard the beats of WHY,EVERYONE STARTED SHRIEKING.It commanded such a huge response I DON’T EVEN KNOW.The rehearsal just whetted my appetite for the show.When we FINALLY went in,I was a bundles of nerves.I was kinda pissed actually because while waiting for the show,they were playing SNSD music.I mean,I love SNSD and I have nothing against the 9 beautiful and lovely girls,but HELLO THIS IS A TVXQ FANPARTY SHOULDNT YOU BE DAMN PLAYING TVXQ MUSIC!!??!?!? =( I feel like the organizers or whoever that chose that music wasn’t respecting the guests of the party and it wasn’t only me who was not happy.You could practically hear the grumble when Mr Taxi was aired.

FINALLY,WHEN THE LIGHTS SHUT DOWN,THERE WAS THIS BEAUTIFUL SEA OF RED.It was small,but the sea of red was gorgeous.You know what’s good about fandoms?It’s that they make you feel like you’re part of one.All along,I’ve always thought as myself as being a hardcore and staunch ELF,but I just couldn’t suppress my love for DB5K.I just couldn’t and it was that impulse which drove me to attending Homin’s fanparty in Singapore.I went with Dynn who was a Cassie for  years and boy,I was just…but when I stepped into the stadium and held the pearl ruby red lightstick,I knew I could belong here.I really felt like I was a Cassie since forever.I mean,what binds Cassies together is their eternal love for the 5 boys,which is what binds ELFs together too.The love for all of our boys will always surpass our individual statuses. The lights went down and they started flashing the 16 min long video of Before you Go to excite the audience and OMG I COULDN’T EVEN STOP SCREAMING.FIRST 15 MIN AND I FELT LIKE HALF MY VOICE WAS GONE.

FINALLY.THE LIGHTS DIMMERED AND YUNHO ENTERED THE SCENE WITH THE DANCERS. GUESS WHAT SONG?!?! YES IT’S MAXIMUM. OMG I swear of all the fancams which I took, Maximum has got to be the best because the security guards were not really in action-as in they weren’t lawfully “clamping” down on “offenders” BUT THEY WERE REALLY ANNOYING.I understand it’s their job,but HELLO WE PAID SO MUCH why do you even have to be so stringent sobs.At least I managed to take albeit short,but audio-video clips of How Can I and Before you Go and a short excerpt of their interviews which was really,better than nothin=D Gonna depend on the awesome people at the moshpit for HD quality videos *winks* Okay,so Jung Yunho is honestly ONE OF THE BEST DANCERS AROUND.HE IS FREAKING AWESOME AND SEXY AND CHARISMATIC AND DANCES WITH SO MUCH PASSION HE LITERALLY TOOK THE WHOLE STAGE BY STORM. Changmin was so handsome sobs.He really had big eyes and nice curls and a toned body and Homin was strikingly tall they are like twin towers.Sobs both are so wellbuilt and their outfit for the night was white and sleeveless and DID SO MUCH JUSTICE to their toned arms.I mean,from where I was sitting,I could make out their features perfectly(even though the camera couldn’t) and their arms.OMG THE RIPPLING VEINS DJSHGDJGHDKJAHDK. In pictures Changmin look lankier than Yunho and not as buff,but in real life,they are both on par.Changmin really has built up so well.Sobs I sound like a mother and Changmin’s my son haha. Changmin tries so hard not to be cute but he is genuinely squishy and  adorable and Yunho is emblematic of CHARISMA IN HUMAN FORM. After Maximum Homin sat down with us with the host and the translator for the night and I really couldn’t take my eyes off them.They were so enigmatic and eyecatching and so…they had so much stage presence. Yunho was seriously a ball of sunshine.He couldn’t stop smiling and throughout the whole show,I kept thinking “HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO “UNLOVE” YOU NOW.I CAN’T I LOVE YOU SO MUCH JUNG YUNHO!!”  Unlike pictures and videos,where Yunho often look more stoic and more masculine,in comparison he looks so “soft” in real life,like so much friendlier and amiable and so good looking.He kept smiling and was so cheerful and omg it’s hard not to catch his enthusiasm. Changmin on the other hand was more reserved and he wasn’t smiling 24/7(haha) but he’s a beauty.He’s so modelesuqe and Changmin kept looking in the direction of me and Dynn,to which we frantically waved our lightsticks and Idk whether he saw it,but HE NODDED.SO CUTE RIGHTTTTT. Changmin was also really really really smart.They had a series of questions where the boys were asked about Singapore and Yunho was trying to be so adorable and so cute my poor heart….when Yunho was asked on the four main languages of Singapore, he started “English,Chinese,Malay,Korean..and Indian” I WAS LIKE SERIOUSLY LEADER.hahah and Changmin took the hints of fans so wisely he got every singe question correct-that brat hahah for example,the one on the national flower which was the Orchid and fan started saying”O O O” hahahhaha. Yunho was asked on what Changmin meant to him and the boys were taken aback by the question-can’t blame em it’s an awfully private question but Yunho thanked Changmin for always being there for him through the tough times and helped him to shoulder the heavyload of responsibilities that come by when you are a leader and I’m just. BOYS I REALLY ADMIRE YOUR FRIENDSHIP. STAY STRONG OKAY.

The boys were asked to speak in Singlish too.Yunho was like “the chilli crabs here are so Shiok” and Changmin was like “Alamak why do we have so many Singaporean fans here? but NO PROBLEM LAH.”  HONESTLY SHIM CHANGMIN IS A GENIUS.He latches on things so fast and that is so befitting of his high IQ.Intelligence is really the way to my heart haha. When Homin first appeared and sat down,they looked abit stiff but that is understandable for it’s their first time in Singapore and they aren’t really sure what to do.There were some glitches in communication where there was no translator and Yunho was puzzled.He looked at Changmin while speaking in Korean and Changmin stared back at him and muttered in korean.Their “helplessness” was so cute but Cassies,being Cassies just shrieked and laughed at every single word spoken from the boys’ mouth haha and as usual,they said that they were pleasantly startled by the warm passion exuded from Singapore and Yunho was so apologetic when he said “I’m sorry Singaporean fans have to wait for 7 years which is really long,but we will come here more often in the future” THAT IS THE GOLDEN LINE. Yunho is honestly one of the best leaders around. Changmin was really really really cute.When he was asked about his FAVORITE FOOD IN SINGAPORE (well we saw that coming hehehehehe), he said “HAIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. CHILLI CRABS” and smiled cheekily. OMG I didn’t exploit the use of the “Zs” okay he really sighed for such a long time haha and I was like typical maknae hehe Homin really loved the chilli and pepper crabs here which is a must try staple food for foreigners in Singapore =D.

The quote of the night belonged to Changmin ” OKAY,YES LET’S GO!!!” honestly.

Yunho’s “NI MEN KAI XIN MA? WO YE HEN KAI XIN?” Bravo leader<3333

They performed a total of 7 songs-Maximum, How Can I, Before you Go, The way you are,Mirotic, Rising Sun and Why. I loved all the songs and How Can I showcased the duo’s vocals perfectly.I love Changmin’s drawling,satin like voice.If Kyuhyun’s voice was velvet-like, then Changmin has to be satin like.Why can’t I fall asleep every night to the crooning of Minnie’s voice sobs. BEFORE YOU GO was my favorite song of the night and I WAS SO EXCITED FOR THAT SONG TO BE PERFORMED. OMG THAT SONG WAS THE SEXIEST.I MEAN,HONESTLY, AS THOUGH THE DANCE VERSION OF THE SONG WASN’T HOT ENOUGH, BUT SEEING THE BOYS PERFORM THAT IN REAL LIFE WAS TRULY THE BOMB. IT OOZES WITH SO MUCH SEX APPEAL ARTISTICALLY AND SIGH. The fanchants were really the blast and wayyyyyyyyyyy awesome.We didnt even coordinate yet everyone was in unison singing along, and chanting along.My favorite was in WHY where everyone chorused “waeeee” and.

“NOW I’M JUST CHILLIN FEEL LIKE I’M HEALIN”-Changmin,Why. THE WHOLE STADIUM ROARED TOGETHER WITH CHANGMIN. It was like, I was totally not expecting it but the lines just slipped off my lips as though I’ve known the lyrics my entire life.I told Dynn “you will end up screaming trust me” and she really did.GLAD SHE ENJOYED HERSELF we kept looking at each other and laughing and seriously best night in December so far. The same thought struck our heads when we were watching the fanmade videos. The first video was really touching but the second one…was drawn by the girl and it was focused on Changmin and when she drew the picture of Changmin crying for GDA 2008,I teared up.Before that the tears were culminating in my eyes but it just couldn’t flow out-I turned and looked at Dynn and there she was crying.I turned back to the video and the moment that Mirotic image of Changmin crying appeared,omg the tears flowed out and I hastily wiped them away haha. Sigh and Changmin was constantly NODDING HIS HEAD throughout the whole duration of the video I really wondered why. It was so cute hahah and both Dynn and I wanted to run up to the stage and backhug HOMIN so badly.THEY ARE SO STATUESQUE AND LOOKED SO PERFECT,EVEN FROM THE BACK.SOBS. Yunho started off by signing the poster for the winner of the fanvideo and Changmin followed suit afterwards and scrawled a Heart with stripes  on the poster,to the shrilling of Cassies haha and he said he almost cried and commented bashfully “thank you for drawing me so beautifully” PERFECT AWWWW MOMENT RIGHT THERE.

All together in summation one thought remained in my head- OMG I BREATHED THE SAME AIR AS HOMIN.

Nah to be honest, DBSK are kings.They are really kings.The amount of stage presence they have cannot be compared at all. They are so seasoned yet they try their best and put in so much effort everyday.I love them so much.Oh and Changmin-in music videos one’s attention is always drawed to Yunho for he is truly a maestro at dancing, but in real life yesterday I have to say that Changmin really PUTS IN THE SAME AMOUNT OF EFFORT as Yunho in dancing.He really tries so hard,that boy and I really respect him for that.It was weird though when Changmin was smiling during Rising Sun haha and at the beginning during Yunho’s part where Minnie had to scream “NOOO”,it was hilarious when the audience screamed with him “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” too haha.

4 DEC 2011-the night I saw DBSK Homin live and I have finally fulfilled my twin dreams of seeing both Super Junior and DBSK live. Iwon’t ever forget how they looked like to me. Their image is now forever stored in the reserves of my memories. 2011 had been so kind to me and my parents have been so supportive of this starchasing dream,which I really thank them for that. I will always continue to be a CassiELF and love DBSJ with all I have in me.They will always continue to have an ephemeral presence in my life and be a force that keeps me so strong.I love them,more than words can say.Anything is possible as long as you KEEP THE FAITH AND PROMISE TO BELIEVE.

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